Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Making Friends with Hockey Parents

For 4 seasons I had my BFF by my side during hockey practices and hockey games. Hockey practice went by so quickly having someone to talk to.  Hockey games were exciting watching our sons playing on the same team. Hockey Games + BFF. Can life get any sweeter?    

Not only did our sons play together, the team was lucky to keep the same group of players for many seasons.  It was a nice group of boys and a nice group of parents.  Everyone got along. We've been together every weekend for many seasons and we have gotten to know each other well. We were spoiled.
This is year is different. My BFFs son moved to another team. Older players moved up to the next level. A few players transferred to other teams or quit playing all together.  The team dynamic has changed.  New players, new parents.
I consider myself an easy going person but I am finding it hard to connect with other hockey parent's.
It seems like there are those who:
  • don't stop talking (even gossiping)… so much so you cannot watch the game.
  • always have something to complain about.
  • criticize the coaches, players, practices, travel schedule, everything and anything.
  •  won't even acknowledge you.
Although it would be nice to get to know the other parents, do I really want to be apart of gossip and drama? Do I want to put myself out there and reach to others who tend to look the other way? 
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19 pretty purplexing comments:

  1. It is very difficult as the children change. We noticed that in our own circle of friends. As the children we drifted apart and found other interests. Take a book with you for those times between periods.

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  2. No, you don't want to be part of that.

    I can only imagine how much you miss the "family" that your old hockey associates had become.

    Here's hoping you will find just the right new hockey mom friend.

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  3. Keep looking, there's probably another mom out there that feels the same.

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  4. Yikes I hate that kind of change. The only good thing is those friendships will not go away. As for the new ones I wouldn't want to indulge in that kind of behavior. There has got to be a good egg in the bunch maybe the ones that don't give the time of day are shy or feeling the same as you. All you can do is be yourself!

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  5. I so hear you on this. Even though I don't have to worry about "team" parents it's the parents at my kids new school. I'm friendly with a few of them but none of them I'd consider friends. It's a new dynamic and honestly, I'd rather sit by myself and pay attention to my kids then deal with the gossip and/or drama.

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    1. I bring a book to practices now. My son is at the age where he doesn't WANT me to watch him practice. I sit in the snack bar and read. I can still watch him without hime realizing it. LOL

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  6. Yikes! I agree with Susi, I'd rather sit alone, and watch the game than deal with gossip and drama. Hopefully, you'll be able to find another "like-minded" parent.

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  7. I know a lot of those parents. They're everywhere, BUT there's probably someone in that crowd somewhere just like you waiting for someone "normal" to show up and make practices bearable. But ugh, good luck until you find that mom!

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  8. There is one thing I learned this weekend at my conference that I didn't quite expect: it is a lot harder to make friends when you are older.
    I guess you just aren't willing to put up with as much "crap" at this age, as you were when you were younger. "Drama" when you were younger was exciting and invigorating: something was going on!! Talk about it - nonstop. Now? Meh. It's actually rather exhausting. I'd rather have the book too.
    I am just not as willing, in my older and wiser years, to deal with certain things.
    Thanks for linking up. And I'd totally know how sit with you and watch the game -- and know when to NOT talk and ruin it. LOL

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  9. Just keep being you and you will attract the like-minded.

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  10. That's hard! I wouldn't want to join in the drama either!

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  11. Ugh - I say take a book and stay out of the drama!

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  12. sounds like not so fun... I think I would take up knitting! that way people won't approach you :)

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  13. Making new mom friends.....I have the same dilemna. I homeschool so I don't have any friends outside the blog world. My husband is always encouraging me to go to mom groups and make friends (for my kids' sake too), but it really isn't that easy, is it? The same questions you posed have run through my mind too. Seriously, why can't my mom blog friends be closer so we can be RL friends too? That would make things SO much easier!

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  14. I had this issue with flag foot ball and karate. I am social, but I don't do drama or gossip so most of the time, I was the mom in the corner reading a book.

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  15. Feeling for you in this new situation. Trust it will sort itself out.

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  16. Happy late birthday....
    I feel for you... It is sad how so many women are gosspis and dramatic... But sometimes it only seems that way from the outside. It depends what is more important to you. If you are happy with your book, I say forget these ladies. But if you long for the friendship, go for it... what is the worst that can happen. You realize they really are big B's or they don't like you,you can always return to your book

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  17. Ditto on what everyone else said! Here's hoping you have a new hockey mom bff soon :)

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